Ode to the Sky

I don’t think I really have the right to talk about it, considering that for these past two years I have been putting NEWS in the background and have not made them a priority nor a driving motivation compared to my early years in the fandom i.e. 2011. Also I have branched off to other interests which may have weakened my attachment to them, but I would like to think that through this “self-detachment”, I could actually have an objective perception of things and not be too blinded by emotions. Either way though, I feel the need to talk this one out, mainly because this issue is affecting me on personal, social, and mental levels, despite not having been emotionally invested in them recently.

I have this to say though: if you plan to know which stand I am really on, you should probably be ready to read this entire entry. My stance is not black and white: it is just a shade of gray, and I can't even tell you how light or dark it is. From my last entry you should be able to know how much I feel about Tegoshi as an artist, but in this one you will know how I feel about Tegoshi as a person. So this can be a semi-rant, but I will definitely try hard to express what I feel as rationally and objectively as possible, after watching his press conference last night, and based on people's translations (since there's Japanese legal jargon and stuff).

SNS DECISION

I will be muting all words relating to Tegoshi and his works, and for now I've even resorted to blocking his account because he keeps on appearing in my feed as QRTs (I don't follow him).
I will be muting anyone who will be commenting a lot about him and his activities.
You are free to block or unfollow me as you see fit. I will try my best not to let go of poisonous comments regarding him, but just in case. Please, you don't have to inform me explicitly you have blocked, muted or unfollowed me. I will figure it out.
If any positive news about Tegoshi pops up that you feel essential in me changing my mind about him, please feel free to mention me. I would welcome that.
But for now the pain is still fresh and I still cannot bear seeing an abundance of his existence on my feed. I am truly, deeply sorry.
Please let me heal, and one day, in due time, I hope I can find myself the strength to finally forgive and forget everything.