Ode to the Sky

I normally don't write concert reports for Arashi because I figured a lot of people are already doing them and I feel really unworthy as a fan (I didn't write any report for Japonism; I don't go for multiple shows nor do I pay close attention / have their music on repeat as much as I do for NEWS), but there were circumstances this year that made this experience worth documenting, and I want to have this report written down so that if ever I fall down into the depths of despair once again, I would remember how I felt during these past few days and be saved over and over again. Sounds like an exaggeration, but it's true.

Since September I started battling work, personal and health mental issues. It all started with two blunders at work - and because I don't normally cause blunders nor do I encounter situations like those, I started doubting my capability. As much as everyone else tried to reassure me that everybody makes mistakes, I was not consoled at all - until the ballot results for Untitled came. To be frank, I had even forgotten I applied, so it was a happy surprise to find that I had hit for my second Arashi concert - and to make it even more special, I had hit for the show on Aiba's birthday on Christmas Eve. Before the ballot results came, I was on the verge of booking a sudden trip home to take time off, but receiving the ballot results mail, I resolved to hang in there for 2-3 more months until the concert. It wasn't easy especially for the month of December (the same month I was officially diagnosed with work adjustment disorder and depression), but I managed to hang on.


( Just a bit before the concert... )


So since I have quite a poor memory of what happened, I will only be writing about the songs / parts that I can vividly remember!


( Looking into "Untitled"... )


After the concert I had to run for Narita again so I said goodbye to my friend momentarily (because we would be seeing each other again in Cebu, anyway). It was indeed a great concert and a great way to spend Christmas Eve - though it was kind of a pain to get home, with all other couples who had romantic Christmas Eves.

On the way home, I kept on thinking about the messages during the narrative bits of the concert, and remembered how they were all speaking of meetings, departures, fate, and meaning in them. It made me think about my own life and how I've met so many people - people who had hurt me, people who became my friends OL and RL, people who came and left, and people who changed my life for good. I'm very thankful especially for Arashi - because despite them not knowing who I am personally, they had made my life take a positive turn. For the past two days I was in Tokyo, I managed NOT to take my antidepressants, which is saying something - I didn't need to rely on any medicine for me to feel better, because Arashi's presence was enough for me to forget my depression. They might be "small" or "trivial" things, but this concert made me realize that they had played an important and crucial part in my "survival", and by realizing this, their presence isn't something "small" nor "trivial". For making me come this far, for helping me out in times when I was down, I am immensely grateful, and thankful for the five of them.

May I never forget "untitled".